I'm a competitive gal

Today we had a health and safety tour of my school.  A really official, slightly scary person comes from the school board for the purpose of finding all the safety violations in my building.  In the past I have recognized that they catch things that my custodian and I miss -- ladders off their holders, fire extinguishers that need to be inspected; and we fix these right away.  But some things that are violations seem a tad silly -- like no pieces of paper may hang on any door because that's a fire hazard.  Now it seems to me somewhat unlikely that a fire would start on child's artwork hanging on a door, but I am not to argue with "the Code." 

All week I've been going over past reports and driving my custodian nuts with my demands.  Move this, hang this, latch this, file that etc. etc.  You see, my goal was to have less than one page of violations.  The average school has 2-3 pages, and big schools can have hundreds of violations. (Remember I told you many are "silly" so don't be alarmed and think your kids are in danger....) 

So today was our inspection.  And the inspector was very thorough (be comforted in that if the above statements concern you).  And.....

Da da da

We only had 3 things to write up -- I hung a fire sign in the wrong custodian room, the gym emergency plans fell down when a volley ball hit them so they were on the floor instead of on the bulletin board and we need to replace an extension cord.  Yes.  Less than one page.  That's better than any schools she's inspected so far...

I waited til the inspector left.  Then I did a crazy little happy dance (think Elaine on Seinfield).  The custodian shook his head and said "only you would turn a Health and Safety tour into a competition). 

And who cares if he thinks I'm silly.

I won.  I won.  My school won.
We're the best.  We're the best.
We rule.
We do.

Ok.  So now you recognize another of my issues....